3 months of Misery for Great Things to Come

¹Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. ²Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. ³Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Hebrews 12:1-3

The last quarter of the year I have been asked again and again to throw off everything that hinders me from moving on with God. It's ironic how memorising these 3 verses is making me live it. Now that I am more settled with some of my baggages (more like I'm throwing them off one by one), I should share my story with you.

The things which I needed to throw off were actually people in my life I have become so accustomed to and dependent on. All of them left me in a lurch, giving me no choice but to breathe and survive on my own. That was what threw me back to God's arms. I was desperate for help. Of course I hid it quite well but like I said in one of my posts, my eyes would have told you otherwise.

Today I can tell you that I am 3 quarters way out of that stage, living much more dependent on God. With my kind of personality and character, giving up control would always be a struggle but God does know better. Who can stand when God demands all of you?

So yeah, God is demanding all of me. My heart, soul, mind and strength, all of them. He needed to take these people away so that I would take a look at Him, and help me fix my eyes on Him again. My gaze shifted from Him halfway through and just recently, another person has been moved away. So I was badly shaken and affected. An awakening for me, but it's all good. God will never take away anything unless He means good as the outcome.

It's not on people that I should lean on because they took my eyes away from the One who deserves. People disappoint always and they will never fail doing that. If anything/anyone hinders our walk with God, they should literally be thrown off. It was difficult for me to do it myself, so God helped by plucking them away one by one.

His grace is sufficient for me, for in my weakness, His strength is made perfect. His mercies are new everyday literally. Try living with brokenness for a long term and you will know how true that statement is.

So dear Lord, thank you for the last 3 months. It has been rude to me but I will be forever grateful to You for pulling the plugs for me instead of making me do it on my own.

My monkeys, you know who you are. Forgive me for my disappearing act and leaving you people on your own. I really need to move on, but I just don't know what to do exactly and when. I guess tonight you'll see me at our usual hang out place. Looking forward to that.

And you, so now you know why the questions. I hope you'll understand where I'm coming from. =)

one life to live,
gracey