He Will Only Take Me As Far As I Am Willing

How do I digest the time that I just experienced? A little of everything makes me a very confused person. Anyone wants to help me?

I have been asked umpteenth times as to why I choose to live like this. Am I running away from something? Why are you wasting your time working for nothing? Isn't that a waste of time? - it doesn't get easier answering that question. Sometimes I wonder together with the person who asks the question. What happened to being ready to give an answer to the faith that I believe in season in, season out? Sorry, Paul.

No, I do not believe that God needs me to help Him extend His Kingdom. He can do that Himself. No, I don't understand every single thing written in the Bible. And no, I have no idea what I will be doing for the next 10 years of my life and I have no ambitions nor the desire to aim for anything world changing.

Whatever that I am doing/trying to do, is only learning to obey the voice of God. I think it is His voice I am following - how will I know otherwise if I don't take the plunge? Neither do I believe in sitting down doing nothing and waiting for the perfect circumstances to appear before I jump. I jump when I need to jump - because I profess to trust God, don't I?

Therefore I do these things because I believe God has said so. To what end? I do not know how far I will go (because I am still human and I do not have superhuman faith) but by the grace of God, He will take me where I am willing for Him to take me. I believe that He will take account of the opportunities He has given me by extending Himself to me. He is taking the risk of letting me ruin His Name because I can choose to walk away even after seeing His faithful hand in my life for the past 26 years. So, I will go as far as only I let Him take me. He wants to take me very far - the limitation is with me.

gracey