I discovered that having a strong will is a gift. Almost forever I have thought that it is a curse upon my life, because being a girl with strong will does not tango in the Chinese culture, if not in the Asian culture. Strong will = negative connotation, that's why.
Very often I asked God why did He make me with such a strong will. I have been 'shot' at everywhere I went because of that and because people wouldn't and couldn't see what I did see. It is hard to stand alone and be opinionated and stand on that decision. Giving up was always an option, and still is, but I don't remember ever giving up on anything, well, except for the active participation in the school band. I still regret my decision because I know I could have stayed on till the end.
So I chose to lay low in KL, invading whenever I could, the chance to speak up and make my thoughts known. Of course that has not been successful, I have a will as strong as steel, remember? LOL.
But I would look back my life and with thanksgiving, praise God because He gave me this stubbornness, or rather strong will. I cannot imagine living my life agreeing to everything everyone said, because I would feel so stupid about myself. Yet at the same time it has not been any fun at all living with strong conviction and opinions because we're now living in a world where everything is relative. It's a GIANT tide I'm going against.
I don't want to lose this gift definitely, because that would make my life boring, even though things will not be smooth and silky. But that's the 'fun' part, really.
So my job now is to rethink how I can use this gift for the purposes of my life vision, and bring them to execution.
same yet different,
gracey
Very often I asked God why did He make me with such a strong will. I have been 'shot' at everywhere I went because of that and because people wouldn't and couldn't see what I did see. It is hard to stand alone and be opinionated and stand on that decision. Giving up was always an option, and still is, but I don't remember ever giving up on anything, well, except for the active participation in the school band. I still regret my decision because I know I could have stayed on till the end.
So I chose to lay low in KL, invading whenever I could, the chance to speak up and make my thoughts known. Of course that has not been successful, I have a will as strong as steel, remember? LOL.
But I would look back my life and with thanksgiving, praise God because He gave me this stubbornness, or rather strong will. I cannot imagine living my life agreeing to everything everyone said, because I would feel so stupid about myself. Yet at the same time it has not been any fun at all living with strong conviction and opinions because we're now living in a world where everything is relative. It's a GIANT tide I'm going against.
I don't want to lose this gift definitely, because that would make my life boring, even though things will not be smooth and silky. But that's the 'fun' part, really.
So my job now is to rethink how I can use this gift for the purposes of my life vision, and bring them to execution.
same yet different,
gracey
7 comments:
Hey Grace!
Strong will is God's gift to you. He made you unique and special...to be strong willed in believing in your Christian convictions, to be determined in serving etc..
So yea..don't worry.. :)
God knows what He is doing!
And the results will be breath taking..
Hahaha :)
Wah...your words...breath taking? I hope so. =) And hope to find a husband along the way. Don't want to end up scaring any of them away. Then again, they would have done self-elimination. LOL. So what would be left would be warriors? Wow. Pray pray. ;)
Hey Grace! I got same problem. Strong-willed also!! hehehe
But it has helped me to push on despite negative criticism... so I guess it's good :P Otherwise I would get easily crushed and end up just following what everybody is saying & doing, not even knowing my own identity.
All of us Christians are going against the giant tide! We need to be strong-willed and stand up for the Truth! Yea!
Me in the other hand.. need de strong will!!!! Can share share ah... bahagi-kan itu strong will yang kau ada? =P jk jk
Irene: Ya man! :)
Lizzie: Don't know how to share with you lah. LOL.
Each and everyone of us are blessed with different gifts, and we can choose to use those gifts or we can choose to ignore them. Some aspects of ourselves we think of as flaws, but you never know, we might be just like the ugly duckling or caterpillar, who's ugliness was a requisite before it could become a beautiful swan, or butterfly. Some say that life is like a card game, you do the best with the cards you are dealt. Like you said, what you thought was a weakness may be a character strength. Sometimes in God's plan, the curse is the blessing. Be firm, be like Peter the Rock on which God builds his church, stand strong against the enemy, be sure of your convictions because we need more Godly people to make a stand for Jesus! Of course a gift such a this does not come without responsibility, it is your responsibility that your will does not steer off God's course. :) God bless u sis!
What wisdom from you lil bro! :) Bless you too Arles. =)
Post a Comment